The moaning trap is so easy to fall into (I have to catch myself all the time) because it *feels* like it achieves something. But it doesn’t. Maybe at root it is simply yet another form of procrastination from the actual task of creating something. Because I know that when I am actually in the zone creatively, all thoughts of the macro get lost as I focus on the work. And of course being in such a mode is the only way you can ever hope to have any kind of impact on the larger environment anyway.
You just have to shut out the noise, ignore the endless moaning fruitless collective conversation and just *make* something.
Easier said than done, of course.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment, Alex.
Although I liked the previous essay very much, the ideas and the way it was written, I am actually glad you wrote a new one, Tom. Let me explain why.
The new one makes a similar point but in a different way supporting the philosophy I have been trying to employ myself. In one of my recent pieces, ‘The Innermost self’, I wrote about erasing the grumpy self and replacing him with a new one, the visionary self, open-minded about the present and optimistic about the future (and not grumpy). The whole essay was my "showing" attempt (It's my favourite by far). The reason behind the erosion was I found out that bitterness and grumpiness weren't helping me nor potentially anyone else. Even if I stated the problem correctly, the subtle solution or signs of it were missing and, as you wrote, it was more "telling" than "showing".
I like to compare it with preaching vs martyring (potentially dumb analogy from many angles but I like it and will repeat it regardless). A preacher tells you what to believe in while a martyr sacrifices himself in order to demonstrate, to show. It's not only better conceptually but more effective practically. And not because it's more expository but also because of the empathy. It’s easier to empathise with the martyr because you can see what was and is at stake and can project it on yourself much easier.
To wrap up my train of thoughts here... I still think the deleted essay was a brilliantly written piece on an important topic. But I realised one thing after reading its new incarnation. Why I like today's essay much more is it keeps the spirit of what I truly believe in. It is about the Soaring Twenties and not about the Moaning Twenties (pardon). Nevertheless, you did everything right, this essay couldn't exist without the previous one and now it is better and more inspiring. So, thank you! I am with you on “Show, Don’t Tell” 🤝. Cheers!
You’ve really hit the nail on the head with this, John. Complaining about something *feels* good but it doesn’t actually achieve anything. It can be good and useful (and unavoidable) to want to get things off your chest and vent but it doesn’t actually solve anything. It doesn’t lead to action, and if anything can serve as a means to keeping you inactive.
I think positivity and optimism are misunderstood ideas. To be positive and optimistic is not to have a spring in your step and a perma-grin spread across your face. It is not the white toothed cliche of the self help guru. It is simply a case of not giving in and believing that your action and contribution can achieve something, no matter how small.
And as angry and down and cynical as I can get I still believe that.
You can only do what you can do. But you can do something and if you do that with maximum authenticity and to the utmost of your ability that will make the difference to a few people and it’ll ripple outwards. And that’s enough. But moaning distracts you from that work you can control. So you have to keep on anyway no matter how you feel on any given day.
That’s what I am finally starting to learn.
Thanks for the great comment John. There’s a lot to dig into and contemplate there. Cheers.
> You can only do what you can do. But you can do something and if you do that with maximum authenticity and to the utmost of your ability that will make the difference to a few people and it’ll ripple outwards
Exactly. I read a quote recently, which I can't attribute right now, "The whole point of your work is to inspire one person you don’t know to care twice as much about the things you care about." That's how it truly compounds I guess.
Sounds like you’re turning a corner, Nitin. Well done.
I have for a while advocated the idea of reading a few self-improvement books and taking copious notes in a commonplace. Once you have done this, you then leave the whole genre alone for fiction.
If you need motivation, life hacks, advice etc you turn to your commonplace notes and implement the advice there. Until you have completely exhausted them. This can potentially gain a person literally hundreds of hours in the long term as they stop the endless search and stop looking for new ‘content’ as a means of avoiding the actual task itself.
And honestly, if anything I write is part of your ‘research mode’ content fix then please unsubscribe and stop reading me if I am holding you back. I’m grateful to every reader and hope to gain more, but above all I want to be *of use* to the people who do read me.
Feel free to email or DM me as I think and talk about this problem of ‘content’ A LOT.
"Showing involves simply creating something better and leading by example." This.
Also resonate with bemoaning the state of our broken culture - I do that too often. Thanks, tom.
The moaning trap is so easy to fall into (I have to catch myself all the time) because it *feels* like it achieves something. But it doesn’t. Maybe at root it is simply yet another form of procrastination from the actual task of creating something. Because I know that when I am actually in the zone creatively, all thoughts of the macro get lost as I focus on the work. And of course being in such a mode is the only way you can ever hope to have any kind of impact on the larger environment anyway.
You just have to shut out the noise, ignore the endless moaning fruitless collective conversation and just *make* something.
Easier said than done, of course.
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment, Alex.
Although I liked the previous essay very much, the ideas and the way it was written, I am actually glad you wrote a new one, Tom. Let me explain why.
The new one makes a similar point but in a different way supporting the philosophy I have been trying to employ myself. In one of my recent pieces, ‘The Innermost self’, I wrote about erasing the grumpy self and replacing him with a new one, the visionary self, open-minded about the present and optimistic about the future (and not grumpy). The whole essay was my "showing" attempt (It's my favourite by far). The reason behind the erosion was I found out that bitterness and grumpiness weren't helping me nor potentially anyone else. Even if I stated the problem correctly, the subtle solution or signs of it were missing and, as you wrote, it was more "telling" than "showing".
I like to compare it with preaching vs martyring (potentially dumb analogy from many angles but I like it and will repeat it regardless). A preacher tells you what to believe in while a martyr sacrifices himself in order to demonstrate, to show. It's not only better conceptually but more effective practically. And not because it's more expository but also because of the empathy. It’s easier to empathise with the martyr because you can see what was and is at stake and can project it on yourself much easier.
To wrap up my train of thoughts here... I still think the deleted essay was a brilliantly written piece on an important topic. But I realised one thing after reading its new incarnation. Why I like today's essay much more is it keeps the spirit of what I truly believe in. It is about the Soaring Twenties and not about the Moaning Twenties (pardon). Nevertheless, you did everything right, this essay couldn't exist without the previous one and now it is better and more inspiring. So, thank you! I am with you on “Show, Don’t Tell” 🤝. Cheers!
You’ve really hit the nail on the head with this, John. Complaining about something *feels* good but it doesn’t actually achieve anything. It can be good and useful (and unavoidable) to want to get things off your chest and vent but it doesn’t actually solve anything. It doesn’t lead to action, and if anything can serve as a means to keeping you inactive.
I think positivity and optimism are misunderstood ideas. To be positive and optimistic is not to have a spring in your step and a perma-grin spread across your face. It is not the white toothed cliche of the self help guru. It is simply a case of not giving in and believing that your action and contribution can achieve something, no matter how small.
And as angry and down and cynical as I can get I still believe that.
You can only do what you can do. But you can do something and if you do that with maximum authenticity and to the utmost of your ability that will make the difference to a few people and it’ll ripple outwards. And that’s enough. But moaning distracts you from that work you can control. So you have to keep on anyway no matter how you feel on any given day.
That’s what I am finally starting to learn.
Thanks for the great comment John. There’s a lot to dig into and contemplate there. Cheers.
> You can only do what you can do. But you can do something and if you do that with maximum authenticity and to the utmost of your ability that will make the difference to a few people and it’ll ripple outwards
Exactly. I read a quote recently, which I can't attribute right now, "The whole point of your work is to inspire one person you don’t know to care twice as much about the things you care about." That's how it truly compounds I guess.
That’s brilliant. That’s it in a nutshell. Ripples in the pond moving outwards.
Sounds like you’re turning a corner, Nitin. Well done.
I have for a while advocated the idea of reading a few self-improvement books and taking copious notes in a commonplace. Once you have done this, you then leave the whole genre alone for fiction.
If you need motivation, life hacks, advice etc you turn to your commonplace notes and implement the advice there. Until you have completely exhausted them. This can potentially gain a person literally hundreds of hours in the long term as they stop the endless search and stop looking for new ‘content’ as a means of avoiding the actual task itself.
And honestly, if anything I write is part of your ‘research mode’ content fix then please unsubscribe and stop reading me if I am holding you back. I’m grateful to every reader and hope to gain more, but above all I want to be *of use* to the people who do read me.
Feel free to email or DM me as I think and talk about this problem of ‘content’ A LOT.
Cheers.